As I was going through my stuff, cleaning up and sorting which ones to keep and which are trash, I found the essay I submitted when I applied for college in Ateneo...

 

"How do I see myself as a person? And how can I contribute to the Philippine society with an Ateneo education?"

 "... I do not want to go on being a root in the dark hesitating, stretched out - shivering with dreams downward in the wet tripe of the earth..." This line is from the poem Walking Around by Pedro Neruda. And in my perception, this is the best way to describe me as a person. Also, in this lies the answer of how I can contribute to the Philippine society.

I have been in the Ateneo for twelve years, learning through the Jesuit education. I believe that through these years; I was guided on how to have my own identity. Now at the peak of my maturity, I see myself as a man with his own identity, his own stand. However, in having my own identity does not mean that I stop growing. I am also open to the mysteries of life. Of course, the FIVE C's taught in highschool plays an important role in my development. As stated in the profile of the Ateneo de Manila High School graduate, "Upon the student's graduation from the High School, he would have been formed into a young man who is CHRIST-CENTERED; is intellectually and academically COMPETENT; has a well formed CONSCIENCE, with the courage to defend what is right and to right what is wrong; has COMPASSION for others, especially the poor and disadvantaged - a compassion that leads him to a life of service and work for justice and peace; and will live out his COMMITMENT in life; his commitment to God, to others and to the society." Although some of these have not fully ripened, I can say that with a few more years of schooling, these would be the most evident values that I would treasure. And that with these values, I would be able to serve the Philippines with the grace of God.

I know that through the Jesuit education of the Ateneo de Manila University, I would be more aware of the present situation. Whether that situation is better or worse I know that I have a purpose. That purpose is to serve the Philippine society whatever way possible with the skills that I acquire. I will even jump out of my comfort zone and uphold justice without hesitation. This I will do for the land of my birth and for God.

I do not want to be just a mere root hesitating and yet stretched out with dreams downward. I do not want to learn if it will only benefit myself. In fact, I will learn for the greater glory of God and for the betterment of the society.

-end-

Now I know why I hadto take basic english! hehe

AKAP by Imago

Nagtatanong
bakit mahirap
sumabay sa agos
ng iyong mundo

Nagtataka
Simple lang naman sana
Ang buhay
Kung ika'y matino

Sabihin sa akin lahat ng lihim mo
Iingatan ko
Ibaling sa akin ang problema mo
kakayanin ko

Pikit mata
kong iaalay
ang buwan at araw
pati pa sapatos kong suot

Nagtatanong
simple lang naman sana
ang buhay
kung ika'y lumayo


Sasamahan ka sa tamis
Sasamahan ka sa dilim
Sasamahan ka hanggang langit
Sasamahan ka sa tamis
Sasamahan ka sa pait
Sasamahan ka sa dilim
Sasamahan ka hanggang langit Sasamahan ka

Today, as things are going to change, God speaks through the passages of 2 Th 3:6-18, Ps 128:1-5 and Mt 23:27-32.  And even as these are happening, He reminds me to hold ground and work for nobody eats without a price. An assurance and promise that through continually fearing Him, He will bring joy.

 "Lord, You alone are my God, You alone I am to worship. Take care of the family, take care of momsie. Fill her heart with the love and joy she longs for. Forgive whatever wrongdoings that has occurred between blood siblings and destroy whatever evil lurks in each one of us. As this is your will, let it be done. Amen."

THE SECOND LETTER OF PAUL TO THE THESSALONIANS

1 ⁵This is  evidence of the righteous judgment of God, that you may be considered worthy of the kingdom of God, for which you are also suffering-- ⁶since indeed God considers it just to repay with affliction those who afflicted you, ⁷and to grant relief to you who are afflicted as well as to us, when the Lord Jesus is revealed from heaven with hismight angels ⁸in flaming fire, inflicting vengeance on those who do not know God and on those who do not obey the gospel of our Lord Jesus. ⁹They will suffer the punishment of eternal destruction, away from the presence of the Lord and from the glory of his might, ¹⁰when he comes on that day to be glorified in his saints, and to be marveled at among all who have believed, because our testimony to you was believed. ¹¹To this end we always pray for you, that our God may make you worthy of his calling and may fulfill every resolve for good and every work of faith by his power, ¹²so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.

 2 ¹³But we ought always to give thanks to God for you, brothers beloved by the Lord, because God chose you as the firstfruits to be saved through sanctification by the Spirit and belief in the truth. ¹⁴To this he called you through our gospel, so that you may obtain the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ. ¹⁵So then, brothers, stand firm and hold to the traditions that you were taught by us, either by our spoken word or by our letter.

¹⁶Now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God our Father, who loved us and gave us eternal comfort and good hope through grace, ¹⁷comfort your hearts and establish them in every good work and word.

THE WORD OF THE LORD... THANKS BE TO GOD

i just read this... a very nice article and may it shed light for us as we search for our partners.

a side note... the statement below on the grading of this paper is a classic urban legend in the Philosophy department. Even Father Ferriols didn't know where this came from. still, enjoy this as i did

----------------------------------------------------------

Advice for the married, planning to get married, single but not
available, single and available, no love life.

Eduardo Calasanz was a student at the Ateneo Manila University,
Philippines, where he had Father Ferriols as professor. Father
Ferriols, at that time was the Philosophy department head. Currently
he still teaches Philosophy for graduating college students in
Ateneo. Father Ferriols has been very popular for his mind opening
and enriching classes but was also notorious for the grades he gives.
Still people took his classes for the learning and deep insight they
take home with them every day (if only they could do something about
the grades...)

Anyway, come grade giving time, (Ateneo has letter grading systems,
the highest being an A, lowest at D, with F for flunk), Fr. Ferriols
had this long discussion with the registrar people because he wanted
to give Calasanz an A+. Either that or he doesn't teach at
all...Calasanz got his A+. Read the paper below to find out why.

----------------------------------------------------------

PARTNERS AND MARRIAGE
by Eduardo Jose E. Calasanz

I have never met a man who didn't want to be loved. But I have seldom
met a man who didn't fear marriage. Something about the closure seems
constricting, not enabling. Marriage seems easier to understand for
what it cuts out of our lives than for what it makes possible within
our lives. When I was younger this fear immobilized me. I did not
want to make a mistake. I saw my friends get married for reasons of
social acceptability, or sexual fever, or just because they thought
it was the logical thing to do. Then I watched, as they and their
partners became embittered and petty in their dealings with each
other. I looked at older couples and saw, at best, mutual toleration
of each other. I imagined a lifetime of loveless nights and bickering
and could not imagine subjecting myself or someone else to such a
fate.

And yet, on rare occasions, I would see old couples who somehow
seemed to glow in each other's presence. They seemed really in love,
not just dependent upon each other and tolerant of each other's
foibles. It was an astounding sight, and it seemed impossible. How, I
asked myself, can they have survived so many years of sameness, so
much irritation at the other's habits? What keeps love alive in them,
when most of us seem unable to even stay together, much less love
each other? The central secret seems to be in choosing well. There is
something to the claim of fundamental compatibility. Good people can
create a bad relationship, even though they both dearly want the
relationship to succeed. It is important to find someone with whom
you can create a good relationship from the outset. Unfortunately, it
is hard to see clearly in the early stages.

Sexual hunger draws you to each other and colors the way you see
yourselves together. It blinds you to the thousands of little things
by which relationships eventually survive or fail. You need to find a
way to see beyond this initial overwhelming sexual fascination. Some
people choose to involve themselves sexually and ride out the most
heated period of sexual attraction in order to see what is on the
other side. This can work, but it can also leave a trail of wounded
hearts. Others deny the
sexual side altogether in an attempt to get to know each other apart
from their sexuality. But they cannot see clearly, because the
presence of unfulfilled sexual desire looms so large that it keeps
them from having any normal perception of what life would be like
together. The truly lucky people are the ones who manage to become
long-time friends before they realize they are attracted to each
other. They get to know each other's laughs, passions, sadness, and
fears. They see each other at their worst and at their best. They
share time together before they get swept into the entangling
intimacy of their sexuality.

This is the ideal, but not often possible. If you fall under the
spell of your sexual attraction immediately, you need to look beyond
it for other keys to compatibility. One of these is laughter.
Laughter tells you how much you will enjoy each other's company over
the long term. If your laughter together is good and healthy, and not
at the expense of others, then you have a healthy relationship to the
world. Laughter is the child of surprise. If you can make each other
laugh, you can always surprise each other. And if you can always
surprise each other, you can always keep the world around you new.
Beware of a relationship in which there is no laughter. Even the most
intimate relationships based only on seriousness have a tendency to
turn sour. Over time, sharing a common serious viewpoint on the world
tends to turn you against those who do not share the same viewpoint,
and your relationship can become based on being critical together.

After laughter, look for a partner who deals with the world in a way
you respect. When two people first get together, they tend to see
their relationship as existing only in the space between the two of
them. They find each other endlessly fascinating, and the
overwhelming power of the emotions they are sharing obscures the
outside world. As the relationship ages and grows, the outside world
becomes important again. If your partner treats people or
circumstances in a way you can't accept, you will inevitably come to
grief. Look at the way she cares for others and deals with the daily
affairs of life. If that makes you love her more, your love will
grow. If it does not, be careful. If you do not respect the way you
each deal with the world around you, eventually the two of you will
not respect each other.

Look also at how your partner confronts the mysteries of life. We
live on the cusp of poetry and practicality, and the real life of the
heart resides in the poetic. If one of you is deeply affected by the
mystery of the unseen in life and relationships, while the other is
drawn only to the literal and the practical, you must take care that
the distance doesnt become an unbridgeable gap that leaves you each
feeling isolated and misunderstood.

There are many other keys, but you must find them by ourself. We all
have unchangeable parts of our hearts that we will not betray and
private commitments to a vision of life that we will not deny. If you
fall in love with someone who cannot nourish those inviolable parts
of you, or if you cannot nourish them in her, you will find
yourselves growing further apart until you live in separate worlds
where you share the business of life but never touch each other where
the heart lives and dreams. From there it is only a small leap to the
cataloging of petty hurts and daily failures that leaves so many
couples bitter and unsatisfied with their mates.

So choose carefully and well. If you do, you will have chosen a
partner with whom you can grow, and then the real miracle of marriage
can take place in your hearts. I pick my words carefully when I speak
of a miracle. But I think it is not too strong a word. There is a
miracle in marriage. It is called transformation. Transformation is
one of the most common events of nature. The seed becomes the flower.
The cocoon becomes the butterfly. Winter becomes spring and love
becomes a child. We never question these, because we see them around
us every day. To us they are not miracles, though if we did not know
them they would be impossible to believe.
Marriage is a transformation we choose to make. Our love is planted
like a seed, and in time it begins to flower. We cannot know the
flower that will blossom, but we can be sure that a bloom will come.
If you have chosen carefully and wisely, the bloom will be good. If
you have chosen poorly or for the wrong reason, the bloom will
flawed. We are quite willing to accept the reality of negative
transformation in a marriage. It was negative transformation that
always had me terrified of the bitter marriages that I feared when I
was younger. It never occurred to me to question the dark miracle
that transformed love into harshness and bitterness. Yet I was unable
to accept the possibility that the first heat of love could be
transformed into something positive that was actually deeper and more
meaningful than the heat of fresh passion. All I could believe in was
the power of this passion and the fear that when it cooled I would be
left with something lesser and bitter. But there is positive
transformation as well.

Like negative transformation, it results from a slow accretion of
little things. But instead of death by a thousand blows, it is growth
by a thousand touches of love. Two histories intermingle. Two
separate beings, two separate presence, two separate consciousnesses
come together and share a view of life that passes before them. They
remain separate, but they also become one. There is an expansion of
awareness, not a closure and a constriction, as I had once feared.
This is not to
say that there is not tension and there are not traps. Tension and
traps are part of every choice of life, from celibate to monogamous
to having multiple lovers. Each choice contains within it the
lingering doubt that the road not taken somehow more fruitful and
exciting, and each becomes dulled to the richness that it alone
contains. But only marriage allows life to deepen and expand and be
leavened by the knowledge that two have chosen, against all odds, to
become one. Those who live together without marriage can know the
pleasure of shared company, but there is a specific gravity in the
marriage commitment that deepens that experience into something
richer and more complex.

So do not fear marriage, just as you should not rush into it for the
wrong reasons. It is an act of faith and it contains within it the
power of transformation. If you believe in your heart that you have
found someone with whom you are able to grow, if you have sufficient
faith that you can resist the endless attraction of the road not
taken and the partner not chosen, if you have the strength of heart
to embrace the cycles and seasons that your love will experience,
then you may be ready to seek the miracle that marriage offers. If
not, then wait. The easy grace of a marriage well made is worth your
patience. When the time comes, a thousand flowers will
bloom...endlessly.

An excerpt from Bo's newest book "HOW TO FIND YOUR ONE TRUE LOVE" this is nice... i'm sure everyone could pick up a thing or two from it... Happy reading! WHEN YOU FALL IN LOVE (Debunking the Myths That Are Driving You Crazy) By: Bo Sanchez This article isn't for teenagers only. Falling in love happens to the young and the not-so-young. (Did you see 42-year-old Tom Cruise jump up and down Oprah's couch because of Katie?) I t happens to everyone. Fat, thin, tall, short, intelligent, uneducated, holy, not so holy, dark, white, yellow, green... it doesn't really matter. All of us fall in love. And we get stuck in myths that drive us absolutely crazy. My goal is to debunk these myths and convince you not to believe in them. Let's begin ... MYTH 1: LOVE WILL CONQUER ALL Let me qualify. This is such a tricky myth. Because love ----- as defined by the Bible ------ will conquer all. But love ------ as defined by glazed-eyed lovers ----- will not. If you believe in this myth, you might do the following: You overlook major obstacles in your relationship. Everyone you know is wondering why you chose that creature from outer space as your boyfriend. Your bestfriends are telling you to get rid of him. Your family is telling you to throw him out of a running vehicle. Aling Rosa of the sari-sari store across the street is telling you to lace his drink with poison. But you won't --------- because you're in love. That's why there are songs entitled, "you and me against the world". Your best buds comment, 'but he's been jobless for the past three years!" And you say, "He's free-spirited. He feels boxed in when he's in the office. '(in other words, he's undisciplined, lazy bum.) Your officemates say, 'He flirts with other women constantly!' and you say, 'No, he's just friendly.' (in other words, he's a pervert) Your cousins say, 'He's taking drugs, He's got needle marks all over his arm. And you say, 'No, he's into cross stitching.' You overstay in toxic relationships, believing that your love will change him The wedding doesn't transform anyone...Even if three Popes officiate the wedding. The person you'll march with into the church will be the same person you'll march with out of the church. He doesn't change one bit. In fact, the marriage makes the hidden more obvious. If he was selfish before he got married, he will be even more selfish after the wedding. If he was hypercritical before he got married, he'll even be more vile and prolific with his criticisms after wedding. Here's the truth: You need more than feelings of love to make a relationship work. You need mature character, total commitment and a minimum level of compatibility. Especially compatibility in the area of values and mission in life. I hear people say, 'We're compatible. Our names begin with the same letter J. My name is Julie and his name is Julio. We're both born in July." Wow. That's so deep, I want to cry. MYTH 2 : WHEN IT"S TRUE LOVE YOU WILL KNOW THE MOMENT YOU MEET THE OTHER PERSON I'm sure you've had this experience before. You are in a crowded room. You're surrounded by boring, noisy chatter when, suddenly, this gorgeous guy enters the door. Your eyes meet. Instantly, time stands still. The universe grinds to a halt. Except for this attractive man in front of you, everything in your vision becomes a giant blur. The hubbub of the crowd becomes a soft muffle and, from out of nowhere, you here gentle violin music from the background. One week later, he's your boyfriend. A few weeks later, you discover that your boyfriend's a pathological liar, buried in credit card debt, borrows money from all his girlfriends (you're his eight in six months). Your mind says, 'Dump him'. Your heart says, 'But it was love at first sight!' Here are the consequences ... You become so focused on the magical first moment, you become blind to the dark side of the relationship. Six out of seven days, you're fighting with your boyfriend. But you can't give him up because you met each other in such a magical moment. Your car keys fell and he picked it up, and then your eyes met, you smelled his deodorant, and you dropped your keys again ......How can you not be meant for each other? You become a love-at-first-sight junkie that you could miss out on the 'real thing'. One intelligent woman told me, 'Bo, there's this guy who's courting me. He's okay. He's kind, he's responsible, he has a good job.......' "I could hear a 'but' coming ," I said. "But there are no sparks!" she bit her lip. "No violin music playing in the background huh?" "None. When I see him, the background music I hear is lululalu-lalulalulalei..." "Listen. You don't need a magical first moment to meet our potential husband. The important things are mature character, financial responsibility, ability for commitment, compatible mission and values..." I actually met this girl again on her wedding, and before she marched down the aisle, she whispered to me, "Do you hear the violin music, Bo? It's loud and clear." It doesn't have to be love at first sight. In fact, marriages with the least adjustments are those between friends who've known each other for years before they realize that they're good marriage material. What is love at first sight? Many times, it's lust at first sight. Or infatuation at first sight. Don't give it too much weight. Here's the truth: it takes a moment to experience infatuation but true love takes a lifetime. MYTH 3 : IF IT IS TRUE LOVE YOU WILL FEEL THIS WAY FOR EACH OTHER FOREVER No, you won't. Here are the consequences for believing this myth : You panic when the feelings wane, and wonder whether the marriage is over and whether you really loved one another in the first place. Imagine the night of your honeymoon. Your new bride is sleeping. The cotton curtains are gently swaying in the cool breeze. You gaze at her lovely face. You study her soft cheeks. Her long eyelashes. Her beautiful nose, her parted red lips. And all of a sudden, she snores. "Ngggggggooork" How do you react? Because it's your honeymoon, you say, 'How cute.' Six months down the road, the same scene transpires. Your wife is sleeping. And the same cotton curtains are gently swaying in the cool breeze. And you hear her snore. "Ngggggoork." What do you say? "Ssssssheeeesh, Honey! You sound like a boat!" What has happened? The feelings have gone. Let me say this: 'That's normal. It happens to everyone. But it doesn't mean your love is gone so don't panic! You can make a decision to love the snoring boat. You start blaming your partner for the loss of love This is nutty. But many people do it: when we don't feel in love, we think it's the fault of the other person. And so we fight him. Again, we fall out of love because we're human beings. It's nobody's fault. The moment you fall out of love, the real work begins. Let me explain. This is the most important point I'm going to make. (I got this from Scott Peck in his bestseller book, The Road Less traveled) "Falling in love isn't love." Here's why. When you fall in love... a. No decision is required. Falling in love just happens. b. No effort is required. Falling in love is like.... Well, falling. c. No hard work is required. Falling in love is being bitten by the love bug. On the other hand, true love requires all three : Decision, effort and lots of hard work. In the Bible, love is a command. You make it happen. Sure true love can only happen after you've fallen out of love. When you begin choosing to love, even if you don't feel like doing it ---- that's true love. And that's the foundation of a lasting marriage. MYTH 4: YOUR PARTNER WILL FULFILL YOU COMPLETELY Again because falling in love satisfied you completely ----- you want the same satisfaction to last. No it won't. Consequence? You might fail to recognize a good relationship because your partner isn't fulfilling the needs you should be fulfilling yourself. Here's the truth: the right partner will fulfill many of your needs but not all of them . There are just some things your husband can't give you: you're self-worth. Your spirituality. Your inner happiness. These are things you have to work on your own. I've met lots of people who think they're dissatisfied with their marriage. In reality, they're dissatisfied with themselves. I've met lots of people who think they're bored with their marriages. And they complain to the high heavens how boring their husband or wife is ---- when in truth, they're really bored with life. Meet your own needs. Find your happiness in God. Find your niche, your calling, your destiny. And then share your joy with your spouse. MYTH 5 : IF IT'S TRUE LOVE YOU WON'T BE ATTRACTED TO ANYONE ELSE If you believe in this myth, you panic when you get attracted to someone else, questioning the authenticity of your love for your spouse. One man told me, 'Bo, I love my wife. Or I thought I did. But then I met this woman at work. She has nice make-up. She smells nice. She wears a pencil-cut skirt. When I go home, my wife is wearing a drab rag. Her hair is undone. She smells of vinegar. Gosh I am attracted to this girl at work." Being attracted to someone is normal ----- even if you have a happy marriage. But being attracted doesn't mean falling into adultery. Every time you think of the other woman, discipline your heart and say, 'Home, boy, Home!' and escort your heart back to your wife. Because if you feed your attraction with fantasies and constantly think about the other woman, it grows. But if you starve your attraction, it dies a natural death.

well... obviously it's been quite a while since my last post... about 1 year and 7 months to be a lil more exact.

 anyway, am still pondering whether i should start this again. what do i put? how do i put it?

*sigh* been very down again and more often. T_T